Grow some girl-balls and come out already
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
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