Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
