i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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