her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
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