I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
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