You're a womanizer and a bitch.
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
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