It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
