ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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