you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
