my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Randomize
