I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Randomize