theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
