I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
