She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
no you cant smoke seaweed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
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