I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
