No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
