for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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