I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
