I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
