hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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