You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize
