Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Women Confess 25 Instant Deal-Breakers On A Man’s Dating Profile
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.