I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
