he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
