No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
