the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
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