My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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