...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
