It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
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