Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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