I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
