my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
