dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
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