In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize