hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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