He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
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