He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Randomize
