you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
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