I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
