I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize