Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize
