people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Is it because I queefed?
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
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i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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