He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
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