Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You dont lie about slip and slides
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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