People in love make me want to vomit
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
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