She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
3 2 1 whiskey
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize