I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
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