I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Randomize
