Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Randomize
