is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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